It’s been over a year since my last post, why you may wonder or not that’s okay 😂……… the year has been okay, mainly positive been trying to live life to the full, going away and enjoying nature. Working and being mum. I found lock down okay, I felt lucky and safe, which I was blessed for. Although many trips were cancelled, I had my kids at home with me ☺️ Mark was off work, but I was able to carry on working from home.
Today was a difficult day, another appointment at the gyneacologist, due to tamoxifen they think – so more biopsies taken. I know its probably nothing however the GP said yes there’s something there, sure it’s nothing but we need to get it checked, the consultant said today sure it’s nothing to be concerned about but we will wait the results – you would think this would be enough to put me at ease – unfortunately when the GP and specialist said the same just over 4 years ago and it wasn’t okay, that haunts you, until I am told the results say it’s nothing to worry about, I will worry – natural I am sure, but it still makes me feel I am paranoid and cancer is the gift that keeps on give or is it tamoxifen that’s the gift that keeps on giving, the fatigue and emotions the other side effects that are personal 🤔. There is talk of 10 years on T not the 5 they first said – I need to take it 1 year at a time, I can do this.
I have started to change my life style, I am not eating meat, not for health reasons as such but because I have grown to love life, wild life and animals in general – I am going to start to walk more, I have slipped into a routine of not much exercise especially with lock down, this changes NOW – although today has been hard and I am in pain at this moment- moving on it’s given me the kick that I have needed
To all my friends and family that keep me going – listen to me moan, because I’ve decided to always be honest about how I am feeling – thank you and sorry if I go on, love to you all 💗💗