As I sit in my mum’s garden enjoying this beautiful weather I wonder what to write, I’ve been quiet for a while, due to not feeling great…and that leads to a not so positive post 😉
I have been feeling pretty good for a couple of days now (long may this last). Over the weekend I suffered with what I can only put down to fatigue…wow it hit me hard, I spent most of it in bed sleeping or resting, when I was up I could only manage an hour before needing to sleep again. But sleep can do me no harm as a wise friend says it will help with the healing and make me stronger for my next round, which is looming (only a week away again). Trying hard not to think about it at the moment – just enjoying feeling good and being able to do normalish things.
Life is short – a saying we say often, but maybe me don’t always digest. Yes life is short but we still, go about life in a whirlwind to get the best job we can, or have that happy ever after, or the best car, up to date mobile phone, designer this and that, rushing here and there. Worrying about what people think etc etc. But life really is too short, and there are many people worse off than me, I have had to stop and take stock, and yes I have too much time on my hands to think, I am so lucky that after chemo I should be able to build my strength back up and get back to my life, loving it …. I have changed there is no doubt that a cancer diagnosis changes you, it makes you feel blessed for every day, and all the special people in your life, but it also makes you realise that sometimes you don’t have to make all the effort, if people want you in their life they will also make that effort, I have some amazing new friends who have kept making a huge effort to stay in touch even when I’ve not returned the effort as I’ve been too ill to – thank you you don’t know how much that’s helped me ❤. Other things I now appreciate are nature and wildlife, took for granted before but now have a love of just sitting watching and listening to our wildlife, no matter what is going on in the world nature keeps going, flowers bloom, birds sing and bees buzz. Unfortunately there is always someone or something worse that people are experiencing and today is no different, a friend I worked with and who has supported me has sadly died today and the fire in London, these things keep you grounded. So I will digest that life is short and I will.enjoy each day as it happens because I am so lucky 🍀