Every cloud

Hi – so I wasn’t sure whether to carry on with my blogs, I feel quite exposed when I write them. But then I think if it helps one person to understand or to know they are not alone – to realise that sometimes having had that cancer diagnosis is like having a cloud over you, even on my most positive days even though I am sooo lucky. I think maybe thats why I hesitate, because there are so many people not so fortunate, so for me to moan seems wrong. But I guess everyone is going through something and its important to them, one person’s struggle isn’t more important than the next person’s, its just different.

This week I had my pre cancerous cells removed from my cervix which is a good and positive thing, the consultant feels that this should have solved the issue and expects next years smear to be fine.

Whilst there i explained about my bleeding, so she has taken a biopsy of my womb, unfortunately tamoxifen can lead to a thickening of the lining, which can mean a greater risk of womb cancer, especially if the thickening has abnormal cells,which she is checking. If all is okay, she has gaven me two choices of how to go forward.

She suggested the mirena coil being fitted again, its a controversial choice as it contains hormones – which is why it was removed in the first place. This will help with the bleeding but not the thickening.

The next choice is a minitouch endometrial ablation – this removes the lining of the womb, seems a bit extreme as we don’t know if it has thickened – so I will need a hysteroscopy a camera to check the womb, to see of the lining has thickened.

Before I decide I will wait the results of the biopsy – if clear which I am sure it will be, I think I will chat to my breast care nurse about the above options and also my tamoxifen options. I feel I could have these things but tamoxifen may still thicken my lining and would I still be back to square one in a few years 🤷‍♀️ oh decisions decisions

Back to my cloud and although its there, every appointment from doctors, dentist etc I have to repeat that I had cancer, that I am on tamoxifen, my children will have to also tell doctors etc that they now have a family history of cancer. Always there. But my cloud has a rainbow 🌈 too, my fabulous support network who should really be fed up by now of my daily struggles on tamoxifen, but they never show it, and I love them all the more for it. They don’t tell me to be positive or chin up, they tell me its ok not to be ok ❤

1 thought on “Every cloud

  1. Lisa storey

    Take each day as it comes and talking and writing about your experience shows we are all human and are not alone .. Am on the list waiting .. I have had investigation (camera), all is well ,thank god .. Simetimes we think for god sake, whats ever next .. But we carry on regardless.. but you cannot think like that or ITS WON what ever that may be .. Onwards and upwards…


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