Cancer has gone ……. I have also now given it my best shot of it not returning!! Go me I’ve done it, last chemo given – relatively easy too, just cannula in finger which wasn’t pleasant actually let’s be honest it bloody hurt, however it’s the last one – so was ok. I could not have done this alone, all my friends that have suck by me, I can’t thank you enough for your on going support, all showing it in your own unique ways and making my smile and cry – sometimes at the same time – I ❤ you all xx My family what can I say? You’ve grown over this time too, and you’ve made me so happy to be back in touch, and I can’t wait to meet up with you all. To family near, they say that when some one you love gets cancer, you get it too, I have felt that for you too, and you are all brave too – I am so lucky to have you all, and sorry I scared you the other week….. love you all.

Now to the next hump in my rocky road, I am fully aware that life after cancer treatment can be very hard. I need time to mourn many different things, from lost friendships to my different body (losing the boobs that fed my babies) losing who I was, and learning to love the new me – this maybe hard and take awhile. I need to build my fitness back up both mentally and physically, and this will take time and patience – apparently I am not very patient!! 

“I had to find a new normal rather than trying to get my own life back just as it was” quote from Macmillan life after cancer treatment leaflet.

I think the hard part is they don’t offer scans or anything ….. So I will always wonder and analyse every ache and pain, I guess I will need to trust my instincts as I did before and that was a good thing or this rocky road could have be a lot longer and rockier. It’s not over as I will be on hormone tablets for 5-10yrs and I know that the side effects maybe hard, especially the fact it will bring on the menopause and more mood swings (I apologise now while I can 😂)

I have slept most of the afternoon since coming home, but feel okay at the moment, I have my tummy injections to start Monday to encourage bone marrow to do it’s job well, fingers crossed that helps if I get an infection. I also have 3 weeks supply of antibiotics for any chest infections, due to infection doing it’s rounds (had these since starting chemo) fingers and toes crossed I sail through this one please xx